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Feeling cheated

It’s funny the things that can trigger off a series of thoughts and emotions. It’s hard to know for sure, but I think that on this occasion I think a few of things came together: an article from a funeral director asking people to stand an pay respects if they see a cortege as with the COVID-19 restrictions the actual funeral ceremony is rather sparse (this in turn prompted a strange dream which let me in an odd mood for the day); seeing my neighbour and his son putting up a pergola; and assembling a Raspberry-Pi based project! [read more]

Posted on 13 April 2020

family  bereavement  loss 

Reflections on fifteen years

My wife and I just hit our fifteen year wedding anniversary (and seventeen years together), which prompted me to reflect on our shared journey. Fifteen years sounds like a long time but in a lot of ways it feels like the blink of an eye. It has been an eventful fifteen (or seventeen) years! During this time I’ve lost a Dad, gained a new Dad, we had three amazing kids, two painful miscarriages, moved house three times, bought a trailer tent, upsized to a caravan, started a salsa teaching company, had various job/career changes, and started home educating. [read more]

Posted on 29 May 2019

love  marriage 

Let's End Chivalry

This post has been in the back of my mind for a while…. I’ve had many conversations on sexism and feminism, and one question that I’ve noticed often comes up (when having conversations with other men) is “what about holding a door open for a woman? Is that sexist?” Men holding doors open for women is just one of the things that society teaches us to do from a young age. [read more]

Posted on 03 April 2018

chivalry  sexism 

Connecting

Last night I went to the Men’s Circle run by Andy Clubley-Moore. I’ll admit that I was a little apprehensive about going for a number of reasons (one of which is my general preference towards mixed groups). We kicked off with a cuppa and a chat, and then Andy outlined the plan for the evening. First up was starting off a sourdough culture. The circle is going to be an ongoing, regular event, and I’m looking forward to some bread from the culture at future circles :-). [read more]

Posted on 30 December 2017

connection  listening  word of the year 

Dear Freddie...

Dear Freddie, I really thought we’d meet you. With the three successful pregnancies that preceded the first miscarriage, I really thought that this time things would be ok. Yes, I know probability doesn’t work like that. But still, I felt that we would meet you. That’s not to say that there wasn’t worry (boy was there worry!), but ultimately I really thought that this time would be ok. Once again, I’m grieving. [read more]

Posted on 14 November 2017

pregnancy  miscarriage  loss 

The power of being listened to safely

Thanks to my wife, we discovered Hand in Hand Parenting a while back and did their starter class. This proved to be a great thing and precipitated some pretty big changes that have improved our family life. Hand in Hand gives a set of tools for parenting, including one focussed on parents: listening partnerships. The basic idea of listening partnerships is that it is a safe place to share and explore your feelings. [read more]

Posted on 03 October 2017

hand-in-hand  listening partnerships 

This is the life!

Note: this post was written a couple of years ago (before I even had a blog to publish to!)… Picture this: We’re away camping and I’m stood in the middle of a field with a cup of coffee in my hand while my 4 year old daughter is sat on a composting toilet doing her business. Holy crap, this is the life! I mean, what does it take to even be able to aspire to this? [read more]

Posted on 20 August 2017

family  the little things  life 

Things I love...

…about you. I love how immensely passionate you get about things I love your strong sense of injustice I love your belief in the good in people I love you for keeping me honest I love you for your desire to make the world a better place I love you for sticking with me even when I’m not giving you what you need I love you for filling forms out for me because you know how much I hate them [read more]

Posted on 07 August 2017

love  life 

Dear Caitlin...

Dear Caitlin. Dear child that I never got to meet. The smiles I will never see, the hugs I will never have. 1 in 5 pregnancies results in miscarriage. Yet no-one talks about it. Most common in the first three months. Which is the point where no-one talks about being pregnant. And if you’ve not told people you’re pregnant, well… how do you bring up that you lost the baby? [read more]

Posted on 07 August 2017

pregnancy  miscarriage  loss 

Introducing...

Welcome to justsomebloke where I intend to share various ramblings. In my professional life I have found that blogging/speaking etc are great ways to make yourself work something out. The process of working out how to articulate something helps to me figure out what it is I’m thinking or feeling, and helps me to understand it. My only real goal as I set up this blog is to help me work through/think through things. [read more]

Posted on 07 August 2017