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Always my Mum

You'll always be my mum....

Posted on 05 February 2022

family 

Feeling cheated

It’s funny the things that can trigger off a series of thoughts and emotions. It’s hard to know for sure, but I think that on this occasion I think a few of things came together: an article from a funeral director asking people to stand an pay respects if they see a cortege as with the COVID-19 restrictions the actual funeral ceremony is rather sparse (this in turn prompted a strange dream which let me in an odd mood for the day); seeing my neighbour and his son putting up a pergola; and assembling a Raspberry-Pi based project! [read more]

Posted on 13 April 2020

family  bereavement  loss 

Reflections on fifteen years

My wife and I just hit our fifteen year wedding anniversary (and seventeen years together), which prompted me to reflect on our shared journey. Fifteen years sounds like a long time but in a lot of ways it feels like the blink of an eye. It has been an eventful fifteen (or seventeen) years! During this time I’ve lost a Dad, gained a new Dad, we had three amazing kids, two painful miscarriages, moved house three times, bought a trailer tent, upsized to a caravan, started a salsa teaching company, had various job/career changes, and started home educating. [read more]

Posted on 29 May 2019

love  marriage 

Let's End Chivalry

This post has been in the back of my mind for a while…. I’ve had many conversations on sexism and feminism, and one question that I’ve noticed often comes up (when having conversations with other men) is “what about holding a door open for a woman? Is that sexist?” Men holding doors open for women is just one of the things that society teaches us to do from a young age. [read more]

Posted on 03 April 2018

chivalry  sexism 

Connecting

Last night I went to the Men’s Circle run by Andy Clubley-Moore. I’ll admit that I was a little apprehensive about going for a number of reasons (one of which is my general preference towards mixed groups). We kicked off with a cuppa and a chat, and then Andy outlined the plan for the evening. First up was starting off a sourdough culture. The circle is going to be an ongoing, regular event, and I’m looking forward to some bread from the culture at future circles :-). [read more]

Posted on 30 December 2017

connection  listening  word of the year 

Dear Freddie...

Dear Freddie, I really thought we’d meet you. With the three successful pregnancies that preceded the first miscarriage, I really thought that this time things would be ok. Yes, I know probability doesn’t work like that. But still, I felt that we would meet you. That’s not to say that there wasn’t worry (boy was there worry!), but ultimately I really thought that this time would be ok. Once again, I’m grieving. [read more]

Posted on 14 November 2017

pregnancy  miscarriage  loss 

The power of being listened to safely

Thanks to my wife, we discovered Hand in Hand Parenting a while back and did their starter class. This proved to be a great thing and precipitated some pretty big changes that have improved our family life. Hand in Hand gives a set of tools for parenting, including one focussed on parents: listening partnerships. The basic idea of listening partnerships is that it is a safe place to share and explore your feelings. [read more]

Posted on 03 October 2017

hand-in-hand  listening partnerships 

This is the life!

Note: this post was written a couple of years ago (before I even had a blog to publish to!)… Picture this: We’re away camping and I’m stood in the middle of a field with a cup of coffee in my hand while my 4 year old daughter is sat on a composting toilet doing her business. Holy crap, this is the life! I mean, what does it take to even be able to aspire to this? [read more]

Posted on 20 August 2017

family  the little things  life 

Things I love...

…about you. I love how immensely passionate you get about things I love your strong sense of injustice I love your belief in the good in people I love you for keeping me honest I love you for your desire to make the world a better place I love you for sticking with me even when I’m not giving you what you need I love you for filling forms out for me because you know how much I hate them [read more]

Posted on 07 August 2017

love  life 

Dear Caitlin...

Dear Caitlin. Dear child that I never got to meet. The smiles I will never see, the hugs I will never have. 1 in 5 pregnancies results in miscarriage. Yet no-one talks about it. Most common in the first three months. Which is the point where no-one talks about being pregnant. And if you’ve not told people you’re pregnant, well… how do you bring up that you lost the baby? [read more]

Posted on 07 August 2017

pregnancy  miscarriage  loss